Leave your ego at home…

design, work-life balance

Any time I interview for a job, I am always very clear that my ego does not come to work with me when creating the designs and messaging for an organization. What does that mean?

When I work for an organization I am a conduit for their vision. While I have the tools and skills and knowledge to bring their vision to life, it is ultimately what they design that is produced through my labor. To me, this is an important distinction because when the client makes changes, I will make recommendations based on my education and years of training, but I will design to their request. Too often I see designers, or people in general, who put so much of their ego into their work and cause so much unnecessary stress and drama.

I understand there are some professions where your ego is interwoven in your career, and those are not the professions I speak of. But if you work in an office for an organization that is ultimately not created by or led by you, your ego should take a back seat to the decisions you make. Corporations bank off your devotion to your tasks and your ego investment to squeeze you for everything you are worth, but the problem is often it squeezes you towards the last inch of your sanity. Ask yourself, is it worth it?

Companies will replace you if you are unable to perform. That is a fact of life, a fact of capitalism, a simple and true fact. So while you should use your knowledge and education and skills to earn a living within either the private or public sector, bear in mind the fact that while companies are looking out for themselves, you should take a page from their book and do the same. Use your skills and squeeze them for every penny you can, but there is not enough money in the world to give them your heart and soul.

Mental health is one of the leading issues amongst us today, even before the pandemic. The truth is that ego that you use to defend a menial decision at work, and start wars with your coworkers, is the same ego that will betray you if you let it take the lead. It will tear apart the balance of your well-being and can lead to unstable grounds that quickly turn to quicksand into mental illness.

I used to lead with my ego. I was passionate and invested and determined to do things my way. I wanted to be seen and heard and respected. It almost destroyed me. When I left the organization I was with that I had driven all of my ego, heart, and soul into the mission and the people, there was nothing left but an empty desk and a faint memory that I was there – which I am sure will fade in due time.

So if you work for an organization – you can have passion, you can have heart, but make your ego take a back seat. Lead with your skills and glow with your knowledge, but the most valuable asset is the one willing to pivot and reconfigure at a moments notice. We know that now more than ever since the pandemic started.

It is a tricky balancing act – keeping your ego in check whilst putting in your best foot forward. It takes practice and a conscious effort to check oneself. One way that helps me is to watch those around me. I am currently working on a few projects where it is abundantly clear that there are some egos fully rooted in their decisions, and I am tasked with the challenge of navigating those waters carefully. Stroking egos and gently guiding them in the direction that brings us closer to a compromise.

This was just a quick note to work healthy – keep your head up, shoulder’s back, and egos at home. Deep breathes. You got this.

Returning to the office?

covid, in-person

Is your job going back into the office sometime soon? Or maybe you are already back in the office? If so, did you have a choice in the matter? Was risk level of each employee considered prior to the recall to the office? If it was not, then your employer learned absolutely nothing from the pandemic.

Two weeks ago I received a call from an old coworker, the one person on our team who was still going into the office died of covid. This person was still going in conducting the administrative duties of the team, only around a skeleton crew of others needing to be there. They were high-risk, which management was aware of, and only went into the office. There was a covid exposure at the office and this individual was infected. They landed in the hospital where they spent the remainder of their days before they passed. Aside from being high risk, they were vaccinated and only in their 20’s.

Why didn’t management change their duties so they could telework? Especially knowing they were high risk. So I ask you again, did your office consider the risk level of the individual employees before insisting they return to the office?

Plenty of people are still catching covid. It is inevitable. And plenty are surviving just fine after flu or cold-like symptoms. Many workers are tired of being at home all day, many managers are tired of managing certain types of employees long-distance. It is easy to dismiss my story and say, “well she was high-risk,” but consider what you are saying. Given what we know about covid, what is high-risk? And what is not? More importantly, are you sure you are not?

To state you are not high-risk with certainty given the aggressive and wide nature of the virus, you would have to confirm you have little to no health conditions. Even conditions that are otherwise easy to manage, and not lifespan altering. Since covid is still relatively new, any condition based on its mechanics can be a trigger to a larger infection. The most benign heart murmur, asthma, wide range of allergies, obesity (American averages, I am looking at you). The point being small conditions have proven to be larger issues. They are like the little crack in the foundation that the virus can use to break down the walls.

If you are a manager, I ask you this – are you willing to take that risk? And will you be able to sleep at night if one of your staff fall to the fate of my former colleague?

I understand the desire or maybe even business need to return to an office that is empty and costing rent, or holding business needed documents and files. But before packing your staff back into cubicle cells like sardine, consider ensuring the ventilation system is up-to-date and stronger, separating cubicles or desks out further, installing windows that open for fresh air and ventilation (many many offices do not have windows that can open causing a horrible lack of ventilation which spreads viruses like wildfire), consider a hybrid experience with staff on a rotating schedule to avoid 100% capacity, and most importantly consider your employee’s individual circumstances. Your employee, just like you, is a living breathing human being. They have health conditions, risk factors, family members they live with who could be at risk. Children under the age of vaccination, children or spouses who are high-risk.

Perhaps your employee is alright but what about their family? An outbreak in your office could lead to employees becoming carriers of the virus. Although they make go unscathed their children, spouse, or elderly parents could not. If someone’s family is annihilated because of a virus your employee transmitted from your office, what is your role in the tragedy? Surely it is not as an innocent bystander.

Employers, managers, are in a position of power over their employees. Many cannot simply walk away from a profession because they are forced to go back into an office. Who’s responsibility is it when faced with these moral dilemmas? If your employee’s child dies due to an outbreak in your office who is at fault? The employer for requiring staff to be in the office? The employee for not resigning knowing the risk level of their child?

My intention is not to advocate for solely telework at all costs. I firmly believe that some professions only function with an in-person environment. And some employees only operate well in an in-person environment. My intention is for employees to be looked at like human beings more than simply assets. For us to stop looking at things in black and white, and start looking at circumstances holistically.

Most of these dilemmas can be avoided, but the key here is communication and understanding. Be open-minded and willing to have these difficult conversation and make accommodations to individual circumstances. This is not the time to worry about fairness to all employees. Remember the difference between equality and equity. Stop thinking of staff as a liability that must be treated the same across the board in order to avoid issues, and as unique individuals who will thrive when provided the opportunity to given their unique circumstances.

Just my take. Until next time, friends.

Work-Life Balance Matters

work-life balance

Today my dog died. He was my best friend, my biggest fan, the sweetest boy you could ever meet. His name was Charlie Brown. He died at 5:08am PST in my arms. I wrapped him in a blanket, scooped him up in my arms, and held him as close as possible. I put my hand on his chest and kissed his little forehead repeatedly. I pet him gently, and told him how much I love him. How he changed my life. How I will never be the same because of him, and without him. And, that it was okay for him to go. I felt his last two heartbeats, and saw his last two little breathes, and then he was gone.

10 days earlier…

Work was hectic, the project I was working on was all-consuming, and I found myself working straight through the day with little to no breaks, and sometimes at night. In those 10 days, I took Charlie for granted. I didn’t pay a lot of attention to him or his brother because work and kid made life action-packed. I didn’t snuggle with him as much as I should have. I didn’t take him out for a walk like I usually do. By the time I realized he was sick, I think it was far too late. I looked for vet appointments, tried to feed him gentler food, held him and kissed him and begged him to forgive me for not paying attention. He looked at me with his loving gaze, like he always did. But this time, his eyes were heavy, his body trembling. He was in really bad shape and at this point, too far gone. It came fast and furious, and blind-sided me when I was already at my limit with stress.

It was just days prior that he went on a walk with me, that we snuggled on the couch, that he kissed my nose. I didn’t see it coming, so I let work consume me. But that’s all it takes, taking your eye off what matters the most just for one moment – one defining moment that changes everything. In those 10 days, I was too tired to take him for a walk. Too tired to play with him. Too tired to cuddle with him and watch our shows. Too tired to brush his hair, bathe him, or put him in one of his cute little outfits. I was too tired because I broke my own rule – I let work get to me. And maybe that is okay for some people. Some people thrive on work, their identity is their career, their purpose. Those people have a different work-life balance than I aim for. I work to live, I do not live to work. I work to provide for my child, my dogs, and myself. So that I can afford for my tiny family to be comfortable and happy, and have as much quality time together as possible.

There is nothing wrong with being committed to your career. There is nothing wrong if you want to work 30 hours per week, or 80 hours, as long as you know your limits. As long as you know what your priorities are. That is what we call, work-life balance. Knowing how much work you are committed to, and how much of the rest of your life you are committed to. What priorities you hold, how you want to define who you are and what you want to do with your time. There is no wrong or right answer. It is an individual decision that no one else can make for you because at the end of the day you are the one that has to live with the choice. It is your heart and your conscious; like they say, whatever helps you sleep at night.

The takeaway from this story is this… Take time to learn what you value, and what you prioritize. Decide what your work-life balance is. Take time to figure it out now. Do not put it off, do not dismiss it, do not wing it. Figure it out and decide what your boundaries are, and set those boundaries, taper expectations. Because all it takes is that brief moment in time, when you look away and lose something you hold so dear to you.

**And I know what you’re thinking, it was just a dog. But he wasn’t just a dog. He was my little guy. An adoption turned into family. He was the biggest momma’s boy you could imagine. He snuggled with me, he gazed lovingly at me, didn’t sleep when I wasn’t home, wouldn’t eat when I was away. He put up with my toddler climbing and petting and screaming at him. He didn’t judge me, or get mad at me, even when I was a jerk. He was always happy to see me, always excited to go for a walk, ride in the car, or just get head scratches. He wasn’t a biter or a barker or a chewer. He was with me during times when I was lonely, when I was sad, when I was lost. He was the sweetest dog, easy going, healthy until the end. He was one of my priorities, and I forgot, and I hate that.

Find your work-life balance. Make sure it is something you can live with. Life is short. Especially for our little furry loved ones.

Best of luck, friends.